Monday, June 20, 2016

to nate on birthfather's day

You could've left. You could have said she wasn't yours.  You could've said you couldn't deal.  You could've made empty promises. You could've made Jade decide everything on her own.  You could've bugged out.  Our lawyer warned us SO many times that you probably would.  I yelled at him once.  He didn't know you.  What an amazing kid you are.  How brave and loyal and loving and kind.  You have a heart of gold, Nathan. You are hilarious and fun and goofy, just like her.  She is always happy. She gets that from you.  

You are so young and have been through more than any 19-year-old should have to...but you fight.  And you love.  You have a selfless love that allowed us to be parents to this perfect, beautiful little girl that you made.  You loved her more than you love everything else.  Your love for those around you is so evident. It kept me going whenever there was doubt. You love like I want Avaya to love.  With all of herself. 

Keep fighting. Because we love you. Because I need you to laugh with and get excited about dorky things with and share ice cream with and refuse to climb high places with. You are my spirit animal. Don't leave me, don't leave us, but mostly, don't leave her. She couldn't have a better baby daddy. 

And Nate, thank you. Thank you not only for our perfect little peanut, but thank you for saving us. Thank you for our family, not just The Johnstons, but OUR family: me, Spencer, Avaya, Jade, Jonah, you. We love you so much Nate. Keep fighting. You've got a lot to fight for. Happy birthfather's day buddy.  











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